I used to replay things in my head. I wanted to understand why folks did what they did. Why did they do that to me or to someone else? Why did the Israelites, with a cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night, act the way that they acted? Were they dense?
We are just like those Israelites roaming in the wilderness. God is all around us, but we doubt. God is all around us, but we still mess up as if He can’t see what we are doing.
For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.
Surely if Paul had issues, we all do. It is what it is. Free your mind to serve the Lord by understanding that when we are forgiven, and we are free to move on. We need to extend that freedom to others also. They cannot explain their actions with anything that will make good sense any more than you can explain yours. We are simply bound up with a sin nature.
It is what it is. The important thing is to repent, and to try not to do that again. Then, see if you can find a way to use the lesson you learned to bring glory to God. Let Him use you and your mistakes to reach others.
Today’s challenge is to understand that we are not free to sin, but we are not perfect. I have wondered at times if the amount of time Jesus was on the cross bearing our sins was proportional to the amount of sin he had to bear. How much was my part? How much was your part? Ultimately, we all nailed him there.
For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.
1 Corinthians 6:20
He paid a huge price. If you are saved, you were bought for a price. Is your life a living sacrifice for our Lord? Or are you spending it looking backward? Don’t waste another minute living in the past.